In September, City Church employed two new apprentices, Chris and Grant. Both young, both excited for ministry, both passionate about Jesus… and both joining us in the most difficult ministry season we have ever faced.
And it’s not just Kieron and me, pastors and leaders all over the city are reflecting on the difficulty of these past 2 years (or more!): the hard pastoral ground, sicknesses (including a brain tumour and pneumonia), mental health issues, discouragement, disappointment and sudden bereavement.
As for us… in July, Philippa and I went through the trauma of a threatened miscarriage. In September, Esther (Kieron’s wife) had an epileptic seizure and has now been diagnosed with epilepsy. In October, Grant had severe abdominal pain the doctors were unable to diagnose… and that is only a snapshot of the waves of suffering that have broken over our backs in recent months. Frankly it has felt like a relentless, sustained attack from the enemy, designed to discourage and derail us from speaking and living for Jesus.
As I sat across the room from Chris and Grant this morning I half joked that we should have told them what they were joining when they signed up to City Church. What we should have said was, “Welcome to the front line…now go and die” or rather “…someone’s going to try to take you out”.
Because that’s exactly what it feels like right now.
On Sunday we were looking at the death of Jesus and asking the question, “What does it mean for Jesus to be forsaken? Was the Trinity broken?” Now, there is lots to say here and the sermon (which you can listen to here) could only scratch the surface, but there is one thought that gives me great hope in these dark days. And it is this…
Throughout his life, Jesus represented all of humanity. He is described as the second Adam, the second “head” over humanity. When he faced temptation in the desert he did so as the man who would succeed where Adam failed, who would obey God and not reject him, who would stand and not fall. He was our representative in life and in death. In his death, the God-man dies both as the substitute for and the representative of our fallen race.
My point is this: if the Trinity is broken, if the Father “walks away” from his Son, what we are saying is that at humanity’s moment of greatest need… God leaves.
Jesus came teaching, healing, ministering to the poor, raising the dead but when humanity’s plight is most desperate, when we most need God to hear and act, he is nowhere to be found. This cannot be the case. I think this is a sad example of 21st century children looking at their fathers and how they walk out or emotionally “check out” and concluding that God must be like that. Moreover, biblically we are not driven to this conclusion… in fact the opposite should be inferred.
The cry of dereliction, “My God, my God why have you forsaken me” is quoted by Jesus from Psalm 22:1 and recounted in both Matthew and Mark but there is no editorial comment, no interpretation offered for these words… Why run to the conclusion that the Trinity broke apart?
Furthermore, this is not the only resonance with the Psalm in each of these accounts. Jesus is mocked (Psalm 22:6-8); his hands and feet are pierced (Psalm 22:16); they cast lots for his clothes (Psalm 22:18). From this I conclude that we are to have the whole Psalm in view here. We read of a sufferer who feels profound forsaken-ness and yet who cries out to God in faith, recalls his character and hopes for deliverance because (v.24) “he has NOT hidden his face from him”.
This gives me great hope as we endure this season. Yes it often feels that God is behind a cloud; yes we often feel a genuine sense of abandonment, but the consistent witness of Scripture and the testimony of the cross is that our Heavenly Father does not walk out on his children, but that he sees, he acts and he does not hide his face from us! So as I consider these two younger brothers who have joined us on the front line, I know that we have invited them to stand in the crosshairs, but I am assured that we can move forward across the battlefield because God isn’t in the business of abandoning his children.







